Tuesday, November 2, 2010

this is taryn

Brian's blog has been commandeered for today.

Hi, I'm Taryn. I'm 17, a swimmer and a freshman at Asbury University, which means I have to put up with Brian way too often. He stole my laptop right now, so I stole his back.

(Not his back-back, because that would be weird. But I stole his laptop. Anyway.)

Umm, Kelsey wants to be mentioned, so here I am mentioning her.

Anyway, Brian is reading something I wrote, but I accidentally deleted something he wrote which I really do feel bad about, by the way. I'm way too mean to Brian. But he's way too nice. Toughen up, bud! Hearts!

Umm, I don't really know what I want to talk about, but Brian is going to have my computer for awhile longer (he's reading 30 pages) so I have to keep on babbling.

Just keep babbling, that's my motto.

I just ate a piece of apple flavored Dubble Bubble gum, and it didn't taste very good. Kinda left a nasty taste in my mouth, actually. Yuck. Makes me want some water, but alas, none exists in my immediate vicinity. If I were to get up, Brian might re-steal his computer and delete this brilliant blog post.

(Haha, re-steal makes it sound like Brian stole this computer in the first place. Which he probably did. Everyone knows Brian is a notorious criminal.)

Oh, if you didn't know, Brian has a Mac. Also if you didn't know, my madre works at Microsoft. This means that Brian and I are mortal enemies. And Brian is the one at fault, fyi. Though seriously, if he had to steal a computer, why on earth would he go for a Mac? Dumb.

Okay, talking about Macs is making me angry. Grr, grr.

Should I be doing anything else right now? Probably not. I mean, sure, I do have some reading for a couple classes and one assignment for another, but who actually does homework in college? What a funny thought.

All I want to do right now is write. (in case you couldn't tell by the prolific nature of this post, I am a writer. Kinda impressive it's been five minutes since I started this, huh?) Anyway, I can't do that because Brian is busy reading, that silly face.

By the way, we all need to give Brian a round of applause for a couple things:
A) he wears jeans now!
B) he got rid of his ugly old jammer and now wears a drag suit like a real swimmer!
Yay, Brian!

Aww, they grow up so fast.

Umm, what else can I babble about for a few more minutes?

Brian just called me infuriating. I suppose I am. It's fun. Makes life interesting, especially when I am drowning in a big vat of liquid boredom. How's that for imagery? Boredom is usually a pale green-gray color with a viscous tactility (is that a word?) not dissimilar to warm honey.

Wow, I really am not thinking about anything I'm saying. It's kind of falling out of my fingers like word vomit. (Yay, Mean Girls!) I just really want my laptop back. Brian is a slow reader, I have now decided, and should definitely hurry his little four-eyes up.

Ummmm, running out of things about which to babble . . .

Kelsey has a water bottle right now which she stole from our 1:00 English class. It had been on the table for almost a week, so she figured she'd just take it. Thief, I know. And kinda gross, especially if you could see this particular water bottle. It's metal and real legit--you know, the kind you could run over with a tank and it would only get a couple dings. In fact, I'm pretty sure that's what has happened, since it does have a few dings.

Kelsey herself is working on a Spanish worksheet. It looks tedious, but that might be because I'm in Latin and can only fondly remember my high school days of Spanish.

Okay, well I am going to post this now. If Brian objects, he can edit/delete it later, but that would make me really, really sad.


  1. I hate to be that guy Taryn, but Brian's posts are a lot more entertaining than yours are. Also, wouldn't it be Brian's Dad's fault that Brian grew up using macs?

    And finally, No Pictures??? Brian always gives us pictures of new people. Low quality post. Brian, you need to train your friends better in the art of reader-service.

  2. At least there WAS a post. And I quite liked it.


    ps Taryn, if you happen to be in English class with brian could you possibly sneak a dinosaur into his backpack for me? That would be awesome.

  3. haha i mean you've all already met taryn, and kelsey, and those were the only people who were mentioned in the post, so no pictures were really needed :P


  4. BRIAN you weren't supposed to read that. Way to follow instructions.

  5. "(Haha, re-steal makes it sound like Brian stole this computer in the first place. Which he probably did. Everyone knows Brian is a notorious criminal.)"
    I died laughing at this after you were one of "villians" in my poll XD