Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Evidence of Intelligent Design, part Double Gamma

Let me just begin by saying that I love my new swim team. Every last one of them (including the people whose names I'm still figuring out).

It was one dinner conversation that inspired this post. It helped me to realize that I have been quite negligent in my duty to helping you, as my reader, stay safe from all manner of impending harm.

We were discussing our zombie apocalypse plan.

First of all, it was decided that the entire population of the (un-infected) Earth would have to move to Canada. Now, before you all start complaining about how awful that sounds, think about it- Canada is cold.

Very, VERY cold.

So cold, that I bet that stuff there freezes. Like, say, the blood of a dead creature with no means to heat itself or intelligence as to ascertain how. Example, zombies. And since it's rather hard to bite/ kill/ do anything when you're frozen like a popsicle, Canada seems like a pretty safe place for when the zombie apocalypse arrives.


No, of course it's coming. Stop pretending it won't, you're just being silly.

Anyway. So now that we all live in Canada, it stands to reason that people would need some kind of secure shelter. Allow me to propose a simple yet effective house:

Ok, I'll admit, most of the space in your house at this point is completely arbitrary- just so long as you have a set of good, thick walls, and Chuck Norris vigilantly standing guard on your front porch.

Hopefully I'll at least be old and senile before this happens. It would put such a damper on my day otherwise!

Oh and expect one of two things for the next post: either the strangest gift box I've ever received, or something about almost getting dissected on top of a dinner table in the caf.

College? Adventurous? Heck yeah.

1 comment:

  1. My friends and I have been discussing our Zombie Plans for about three years now. I still don't have mine completely, but it will definitely involve crossbows.